Things Awesome colleges require from people that I unsuccessfully make an attempt at succeeding at everyday

1. Know the news people. Know what’s going on in your government, in Iran’s government, and basically all governments in the world and its societies, and most importantly, how it affects our own society (yours, not America’s)

2. Create something. CREATE. Pages filled with words that tell a story. A science program, debate club, arts program, oh, and of course don’t forget the existential overused but still in need of environmental program!!! Just create something

3. Win awards. Not just local regional awards. National Awards. NATIONAL Awards people in writing or science and engineering or whatever.

4. Read the classics to supposedly get a better understanding of the influence the past society had on today’s society. And read books overall, so when in the college interview they ask what’s single handedly the most significant thing you learned from books, you say: life and stuff. (not really; you say something with a hint of both pretentiousness and realism, or I guess the way you would say it in normal conversation.

5. Be smart. Just be smart in any way you can.

6. Challenge yourself and as a result deteriorate your sleeping schedule due to insomnia, stress, and homework on a subject you don’t even believe should exist in your life (Chemistry)

7. Use BIG words. LIKE THIS. No- just kidding. Don’t use big words…use higher level diction…..God I hate growing up.

8. Have a hard notch life to tell colleges about the rough life you lead while maintaining above a 4.0 GPA and winning national awards

AND AT LONG LAST, WHAT ALL AWESOME COLLEGES LOOK FOR IN A STUDENT:

Change the freaking world at age 16.

No exceptions. This one is seriously nonnegotiable. A must do.

By Awesome colleges I hope you understood Ivy league colleges, but really, they’re not that awesome.

They’re kind of ruining my life.

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